You have likely had to work with difficult people. They get on your nerves because they are too loud, too slow, too nervous, too protective, too abrupt, too detailed, too sloppy, too cheeky, too touchy…bottom line they just do things different than you do. A pastor friend of mine once told me, “Ministry would be great if it wasn’t for all the people.”
What About You?
But have you ever considered what it might be like to work with you? Your first thought was probably something like, “But I am wonderful to be around. I always get along with me.” Take a minute and give this some serious thought. Ask yourself, “What is it like to receive a call from me, sit in a meeting next to me, manage me, work for me?” For example, in your last meeting did you talk a little too much? Did you actively listen?
Consider trying to step out of yourself and observe how those around you react to what you say and do for a couple of days. Take notes in a journal to compile your thoughts.
Observe Yourself
Try recording your next presentation with your phone for review of not only how you come across but also to watch for the reactions of your audience. Hit ‘record’ on your next Zoom or Teams meeting as well. A great body language exercise is to watch the recording with the sound off and observe what you are communicating physically. You want to make sure all your communication is in alignment and working for you, not against.
Get Feedback
If you are secure enough to invite constructive feedback, let some trusted coworkers know you are trying to grow and want their input. Ask them to pay attention to your interactions for a few days and offer their thoughts afterwards. Ask for specific thoughts on how you can get better at listening, receiving feedback and encouraging discussion. Some will hesitate to give a critique but will be more forthcoming if you tell them you are trying to grow and want their help to “improve.” If you are really brave you could ask someone who you sense is not a fan of yours.
From all of this, you can uncover meaningful opportunities to improve communication and build stronger workplace relationships. Embracing these insights will not only enhance your professional growth but can also inspire those around you to reflect and grow as well. One thing to keep in mind…if in turn a coworker asks you for feedback, make sure you don’t whip out a pre-written list too quickly.
