“I just realized this whole mess started because I was afraid a simple mistake would go viral in the C-Suite. I overcorrected in hopes that no one would notice.”
The new vice president sat across from me shaking his head as he reflected on his first leadership team meeting.
He had come into the role wanting to make a strong impression. Instead, fear after making a mistake led to a decision that created bigger problems than the original issue ever would have.
As we unpacked what happened, he arrived at a powerful realization:
“My decisions aren’t just being driven by facts. They are also being driven by fear.”
How About You?
Think about the last major decision you made. How much influence did fear have on the outcome?
Most leaders don’t recognize fear when it’s happening. It rarely announces itself. Instead, it often disguises itself as urgency, caution, perfectionism or the need to maintain control.
The truth is that fear is one of our most powerful emotions. It was designed to protect us from danger and help us survive. In the right situations, fear is incredibly useful.
Fear Helpful?
Fear can help when:
- a threat is real and immediate
- you need to act quickly to protect yourself or others…think fight or flight
- it motivates wise behavior, like slowing down when you see a police car
- it sharpens your focus before an important presentation, meeting or event
Dangerous
But fear becomes dangerous when it starts making decisions for us.
That’s when it can lead to:
- knee-jerk reactions
- overcorrections
- premature decisions
- poor judgment
- avoidable mistakes
I’ve noticed that many leadership problems aren’t caused by a lack of intelligence or experience. They are caused by fear operating beneath the surface.
Fear of failure.
Fear of criticism.
Fear of rejection.
Fear of disappointing others.
Fear of looking incompetent.
When fear takes the driver’s seat, we often create the very outcomes we were trying to avoid.
It is not an accident that the Bible gives us 365 verses with some form of “Do not be afraid.”
Grace
God gives us only the grace for today.
He does not give us the grace for tomorrow or even our imaginations.
Many of our fears aren’t based on reality. They’re based on stories we’re telling ourselves about what might happen.
So how can we keep fear from hijacking our decisions? Here are five POWER moves to consider:
P – Pause
Fear thrives in speed.
When you feel pressure to act immediately, pause long enough to identify what you’re feeling.
Ask yourself:
“What am I afraid might happen?”
Simply recognizing fear’s presence often weakens its grip.
O – Outside Perspective
Fear narrows our field of vision.
Find a trusted friend, mentor, coach or colleague who can help you separate facts from assumptions.
A respected outside voice can often see clearly what fear prevents us from seeing.
You could also consult your personal or the company’s mission/purpose statement as a reorientation in the midst of a dilemma.
W – Wait
Many poor decisions are made when we’re emotionally depleted.
If possible, delay major decisions when you are:
- tired
- angry
- lonely
- hurt
- sick
- emotionally overwhelmed
Time often brings clarity that pressure cannot.
E – Exaggerate It
This may sound counterintuitive, but sometimes it helps to play out the worst-case scenario.
What if your fear actually happened?
Could you survive it?
Could you recover?
Could you learn from it?
Many fears lose their power when we drag them out of the shadows and examine them honestly.
R – Reframe It
Fear often speaks in extremes:
“This will never get better.”
“Everything is falling apart.”
“Everyone thinks I’m failing.”
These statements are rarely true. A better strategy is to identify the lie and replace it with the something more helpful like “What’s one step I can take right now in a better direction?”
Reframing doesn’t ignore reality. It helps us engage reality with potential solutions.
Final Thought
Fear is a terrible decision-maker, but it can be an excellent indicator.
The goal is not to become fearless.
The goal is to become aware enough to recognize fear’s influence and courageous enough not to let it make your decisions.
The next time fear shows up in a decision, don’t react.
Choose to act by walking through POWER.
You’ll make better decisions as a result.
